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Pancakicide: Title Page

                    Pancakicide     It’s Like a Flippin’ Comedy, or Whatever                               Caution: Contains Swears and Violence and Stuff...

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Pancakicide – Chapter 1- What the fucking fuck?

            When Trudy opened a pancake house, she never thought it would lead to murder.     But it, like, did, it totally, really did. Like, lead to murder. Totally for real murder-y murder. Like,...

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Pancakicide – Chapter Two – Buttmuffins Aplenty

      It was dawn.     The dawn wasn’t rosy-fingered or anything, because even though the work this phrase appears in is probably well within the public domain and whatnot after two-and-a-half-plus...

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Pancakicide – Chapter 3 – Insert Descriptive Obscenities Here

    When Trudy came to, she was, like, totally, like, totally disoriented and stuff.     She was, like, totally, like, totally disoriented and stuff.     Like, totally, like, totally – (VIRTUAL SLAP!)...

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Pancakicide – Chapter Four – Hello Dunnit? or Roeful

      (So, like, Hello Kitty, like, disguised as a, like, panda is the murder-y murderer? Like, for realsies)?   (This is still a, like, mystery, so, like, no, like, Hello Kitty didn’t dunnit. Like,...

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Pancakicide – Chapter Five – Never Buy a Pink Personal Massager From a Pirate

      Bett’s cell phone alarm went off at 3:45. She made a series of futile smacking gestures in the general vicinity of the horrible, brain-shattering sound, followed by trying to reason with it,...

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Pancakicide – Chapter Six – By the Itching of My Bum, Something Mysterious...

(Wait! Like that’s it? What kind of shoes? Were they yellow suede loafers? Come ON, man)! (Mystery). (So, at this point I should just like, assume this is a frigging mystery and you aren’t going to...

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Pancakicide – Chapter Seven – Little Shoppe, Little Shoppe of Donuts

        Like, so Trudy had, like, made it to the door of the donut shoppe, peered inside, and saw, like, exactly like who “The X-Files” like told her to trust: like, no one. So she, like, tried the...

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Pancakicide – Chapter Eight – Hamtos

Bett was on her way to work. She had thrown on the first pair of matching shoes she could put her hands on and headed out the door. She was about three blocks away when she realized she hadn’t locked...

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Pancakicide – Chapter Nine – (If you whisper ‘(Mystery).’ again, I will,...

(Okay, like, a: “…for the the third and final time” – like the third and final time that morning, or like, the third time that morning and the like FINAL final time? Plus, also, like, b: Like what...

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